Where’s The Justice….the IRS!

IRS (Internal Revenue Service) … Justice. They don’t belong in the same sentence. It’s the very definition of an oxymoron.

irs audit red flags the dirty dozen 300x187 Wheres The Justice....the IRS!A few years back, I was notified of an audit of my personal tax return. Everybody’s nightmare, right? Even if you haven’t done anything wrong, a mantle of guilt settles across your shoulders like an iron cape. I telephoned my tax preparer. Waiting for her to pick up, my inner dialogue went something like, “We didn’t do anything wrong, right?” (Defensive) “What did we do wrong?” (Fear) “Dammit… this is going to be a pain in the wazoo.” (Anger)

My accountant was soothing, assuring me that as my preparer, she would attend the audit. The IRS suggests that you be represented at any audit if you don’t prepare your own taxes. However, I had to compile the data for her to take.

We had a month before the appearance, but I had no idea how many hours it would take to compile figures from four years prior. Phone calls to the pharmacy, collating receipts in chronological order for business. I’m an organized person; some have accused me of being overly so, but this was a stretch even for me. I lost sleep, lost weight, and damn near lost what’s left of my mind, to worry. In my case, “extra money” is also an oxymoron.

A few months later, I was informed by my accountant that the verdict was “no taxes due.” Thrilled cannot describe my relief as the iron cape of guilt bit the dust. Happy ending! Shortly after, I opened my mail to find her invoice for services rendered. The charges were legitimate. She did the time, obviously presented our case well, as “no tax due” audits are rare, and she deserved to be paid. The question is, paid by whom? I wrote the check, and have been seeking reimbursement ever since.

When you are wrongfully accused of speeding you can go to court, present your case and be alleviated of the fine. People falsely accused of heinous crimes have been freed from jail and often awarded compensation for wrongful imprisonment.

I’ve been calling, but I’m not sure flesh and blood people work at the IRS. I only get recordings. My messages go unanswered. For sure, they don’t pay their bills… at least they haven’t paid mine. I’ve been invoicing them for over a year… nada.

IRS 2 Wheres The Justice....the IRS!My friends shrug their shoulders when I rant about this. My total non-acceptance of the IRS’s non-reimbursement policy (I assume that’s what it is) annoys them. I’ve a right to expect justice! I wasn’t even afforded an “Oops! Sorry!” They advised strongly suggested that I send my preparer; I’m sure they know that accountants don’t work for free. Where’s The Justice with the IRS?

So, does anybody out there know somebody who works in accounts payable at the IRS, or does anyone know of a legitimate billing address?

If I get audited again, I’m asking for payment in advance.


 

Where’s The Justice…Karma

karmapolice Wheres The Justice...KarmaI can still see my grandmother’s index finger wagging as she lectured, “What goes around, comes around. You’ll see.”

And sure enough, the boy who made fun of my stuttering in the third grade got hit in the face with a baseball, broke his jaw and had to have his mouth wired partially shut. I was an instant believer. When I told Grandma, she winked, hugged me and said. “See? You didn’t have to do a thing!” Continue reading

Where’s The Justice… Confessions of a Corporate Slut

ccs hr web Wheres The Justice... Confessions of a Corporate SlutMy book is titled Confessions of a Corporate Slut and is a fictionalized memoir about life as a corporate wife. It’s a career position, for those of you who aren’t aware, and is unpaid in terms of dollars. It’s meant to provoke introspection, illumination, and a hopefully trigger  a few laughs. Reviewers call it “wry.” Continue reading

St. Patrick’s Day… Where’s The Justice?

st pats St. Patricks Day... Wheres The Justice?Tomorrow is St. Patrick’s Day. Rivers and countless kegs of beer will be dyed green and some will leave work early to get a head start on the party. It occurred to me that for a nation so worked up about immigration, this is the one day every year when Americans want to co-opt another nationality. Are you Irish on St Patrick’s Day? Continue reading

WHERE’S THE JUSTICE… Dating and My Hair

A Woman of Substance 300x220 WHERES THE JUSTICE... Dating and My HairI fight with my hair every day. It’s red, its texture is fine and because it is totally void of body, it’s stick straight. If an actual dialogue could be heard it might go something like this: Continue reading

The Sisterhood… WHERE’S THE JUSTICE?

sisterhood 286x300 The Sisterhood... WHERES THE JUSTICE?I wasn’t raised as a girl. Don’t get the wrong idea… It’s not like I was abandoned in the woods and adopted by a pack of wolves. I just bonded more powerfully with my father than my mother. Dad never called me princess and never mentioned that a prince on a white horse would bring me “happily ever after.” When I got dressed up, he didn’t tell me that I looked beautiful; he said “You look good, little one… look good.” Continue reading

Count Your Blessings… Where’s The Justice?

CountYourBlessings+transfer graphicsfairy2sm 300x285 Count Your Blessings... Wheres The Justice?They were minor, really. Small complaints. A check that wasn’t as much as I had counted on, a spot on a t-shirt that wouldn’t come out, a muggy day. “Count your blessings,” my friend said, in a voice more suited for the kid about to board the short bus. Continue reading

A crooked golden rule… Where’s The Justice?

golden rule 300x242 A crooked golden rule... Wheres The Justice?“After all I’ve done for him,” an acquaintance recently bawled. “He won’t give me more than the 5% discount he gives everybody else.”

“Did you ask for some sort of concession before you sent him the referrals?”

“Well, no!  I sent him those people out of the goodness of my heart. But you’d think that he would reciprocate.” Continue reading